Wednesday, December 30, 2009


In terms of updating this blog, I have become very lazy indeed. However, I’m here now, so that’s all the matters.. I thought I’d get another post in before the New Year, a little reflection on a year that was..

As 2008 drew to an end I was so psyched for 2009! There was a Supernatural convention that I was determined to go to; New Moon was being released, as well as Transformers2; and most importantly, I was going to Japan!! 2009 was going to be a fresh start. And you may think, “You’re 17 (I was 16 at the time), what could you possibly need a fresh start for?..” Well, I’d done things that I wasn’t proud of. Not towards other people, or anything that would affect anyone else; but things that affected me, things that I personally had to deal with and live with everyday.

So, 2009! Japan was amazing! It was one of, if not the most incredible experience of my life! It is something that I’ll always look back on with fond memories! Whether it was taking part in traditional Japanese activities such as tea ceremonies and wearing Kimono’s, or singing songs and quoting Harry Potter at the top of our voices through the streets of Japan, I will always remember what an amazing and educational experience it was – a once in a lifetime experience.

Transformers was released, New Moon was released, and they were fantastic!! I love my movies, especially when I’ve been so anxious for their release, so excuse me when I get excited over something so insignificant. Friday the 13th with Jared Padalecki and My Bloody Valentine with Jensen Ackles were also released! Anything that involves my boys is exciting!

HOWEVER, I didn’t get to go to the Supernatural convention. I was so mad! I had the money, I was all set. But mum and dad didn’t want me going to Sydney.. I guess that’s understandable, but to me it with was a matter of life and death! (But it’s okay, I’m going in 2010! There’s one in Melbourne!! Tickets are already bought and everything!)

And, possibly the most exciting news of 2009, BLINK 182 GOT BACK TOGETHER!! Man, I always knew they would. People tried to convince me that it’d never happen. They told me to just let it go, that they were done with. BUT THEY WERE WRONG!! Blink 182 got their act together, toured the US, and now they’re set to bring out an album in 2010! Which, I’m hoping, also means a world-wide tour.. Australia, GET READY!!

All in all 2009 seemed to be a good year – on the surface. It’s incredibly easy to hide your emotions when you’ve been doing it for so long. I told myself 2009 was going to be a new start, but if anything it was a step in the opposite direction. I suppose I came out of it okay, but it was a tough journey. I was on the edge for so long, years of suppressing every negative feeling I’d ever thought, hiding it from the world.. until it all became too much. “Poor little me”, huh.. But I found comfort in two dear friends of mine. They both helped in different ways; one was the listener, the other provided comfort. They didn’t have to be conscious of what was happening to be able to help, and that was nice. Despite my support system, trying to deal with school and everything else was hard, though I didn’t let it show. I always knew that what I was doing at school I could do better, but to be honest I just didn’t care anymore. Then, out of nowhere and completely unexpected, I got some mail :) and that was a turning point for me. There was no way I was okay, and everything didn’t suddenly go away, but I was different. I looked at things differently, and most importantly I was trying. I no longer gave up because things got hard. When I wasn’t in a good frame of mind, I found different alternatives to channel my thoughts into. One of those alternatives being this blog... not all the time.. but sometimes.

2009 was a mixture of emotions. It was fun, epic, entertaining, difficult, draining, life changing. Now 2010 is around the corner. I have year 12 ahead of me. A year that I’m terrified of and dreading, yet a year that holds much to look forward to.